


yeah, that is that.

by bakedvick



Category: Wynonna Earp (TV)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-01-25
Updated: 2019-02-01
Packaged: 2019-03-09 08:04:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 1,495
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13477209
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bakedvick/pseuds/bakedvick
Summary: when you feel things you don't wanna feel, but, the feelings come any way.





	1. you

**Author's Note:**

> my heart aches of it.

i was thinking about you yesterday  
and, you appeared in my dreams today.

i saw you last week, we kissed  
and, you gave me something i never had before.

i lost my track of time when your smile reached your face because of something i said.

i was so good with words, but, next to you everything is blur.  
i can only see you.

.it starts with your eyes  
then your nose  
then your lips  
your cheeks  
your neck  
your collarbones  
your breasts  
your belly  
your thighs.

behind you, there's a blank.

you are everything i see.

your lips find mine.  
your arms hug my neck and i pick you up.  
your legs around my waist.

i want to bring your heart closer.

i know you are everything i need.


	2. away

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> you still on my mind.

i wonder if you remember the last time we were close?

your hand on my neck  
my hand on your hip  
the others interwined, high.

the light was low, a breeze.  
your eyes were shining more than the stars outside that room.  
my face was lit, i was on fire.

i had a smile that wouldn't go away.  
i used to enjoy that,  
maybe, i still do, but, there's no way to know.

your body pressed on mine  
our lips so close and we were laughing.  
no one was near and we wouldn't care if they were  
we were so close, so joined.  
where are you now?

you were everything i was seeing and wishing and breathing.

that was everything.

you are.  
am i?


	3. still you

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> when are you gonna leave me?

do you understand what i mean:

when i say i'm in love?  
when my eyes catch your silhouette down the hall and i know you are coming my way?  
when my breath gets heavy cause i know you are so close to finding out that everything i thought it was right, is wrong, and you are the only certainty i have?  
when your body fits perfectly on mine in my dreams of you?  
when i remember the only moment we were together? 

i've been dreaming of you since then,  
i've been idealizing things  
thinking about letting it all behind.  
for you.

(it's crazy)

it was just one moment.  
it was just one fuck.  
it was just you all over me and everything changed.

 

does this mean anything like i think it means?

that you are the one and my heart is yours.

that you are gonna say 'no' and i'm gonna be broken all over again.

  
i think thats what it is.  
i think you are gonna break me.  
and, i think i need this.

  
i feel like i need your _touch_ to break me,  
your _kiss_ to crack me open,  
your _pussy_ to dissolve me in something new.

another life in my own.  
another me for you.


	4. solo

as life goes, i think about you a lot  
i think about the day we met and how you were so sweet to me  
i think about the day i realized you were all i ever wanted  
i think about the day you looked at me and said: i love you too  
i think about some of my greatest days and how they were so great because i was with you  
i think about some of my worst days and how you were trying to be there for me, to embrace every bit of me  
i think about our kisses and how we cherished each other  
i think about what i wanna say to you if i ever see you again  
i think about me walking on this life alone and you having all the grace in the world  
i dream of a big room full of roses and rays of sun coming from the window and how it shines on you.  
i wake up alone, far from you and inside of me losing and lost each day more.  
will i ever be more? will you ever come back?  
can i be on my own?


	5. dream

we were with some friends, talking and laughing, we had to get something from your house and left them for it. of course i thought: hey, we are gonna be together and alone, maybe she will kiss me. and, you did. we kissed and i made you feel so good. 

i touched you in all the right places and you were so loud, so beautiful.

i woke up, was alone in my bed and even in my dream i knew it couldn't be possible, i knew we could only be doing that if it wasn't real. if i felt like you were everything to me in there and i was living my best life 

maybe it would change something in reality.

maybe, i should talk to you. maybe, i should let you know that my mind is empty and my heart is broken, but, you are the one that make a difference sometimes. maybe, you would be happy if i told you that. maybe, i am the only one that is looking for this kind of happiness because i can't make another one fulfill me like i need it.

you should see me in my dreams, in love with you. waiting for your touch and kiss. you should see me living a life for good and for real, not in the way i am right now, lost and sad, 

this sadness that present itself as no-ending.

 

i should see myself as the way my dreams let me be, i should change all of it.

give me the strength.


	6. must

i wish i could write to you. to say all the things that i have on my mind all day wanting you.

all day, when i think: oh, she is gone. you say 'hello' by bringing me memories of kisses and wetness, my fingers in you.

my life so blue, and i don't even understand why they say 'blue' when it is the most beautiful color, and it makes me remember you because there was beach and blue skies and the ocean as heaven,

you getting out of it.

you looking at me. you letting me know that you would not leave, not for a long time. and, here i am, almost a year that i realized you would make me feel all type of things.

i am here, writing, because i can't use my fingers for something better. i can't draw lines on your skin, lines that will say:

 ~~'am i really here, loving you?'~~ ,

~~'is this really happening?'~~

**'can i believe in my heart, that is broken and lost?'**

your skin so soft. your eyes so full of life. and wishes. and victory. i can see a future so blessed and beautiful.  _and, i wish i could be sure to be in it._

well, to let you know.

i would get near you, and i would look in your eyes the way that i'm sure i look when i have had some weed and have my feelings all over the place. i would look deep, and there would be shivers and i would cry, and it makes total sense because this feeling is so beautiful and i just can't believe i'm feeling it and i'm telling you this and i am on the top of the world and you can see me, you can see my feet leaving the ground and the air is pushing me close to you, so close.

 

i _think i will be inside you. the feeling. the love. the necessity. my heart. my ways. my losing and my wining. one in one._  

you look at me: 

i'm falling, either way i will be crushed on the floor.

it can be from the way i will be able to resurrect after or they can just throw dirt on me and leave me there.

 

love is the beggining and the end.

this life is over, either way.

can i begin again?

 

i can't tell you anything,

 

i can't  


	7. sober

i wish i was high  
wasted  
far away from this reality...

looking at you, you high  
the stars

i don't even care about the present or where we are going from here  
i just wanna kiss your lips, your face, your neck.

take off your blouse, kiss your collarbone, get you chill  
we been chilling, your eyes  
you look at me, inside my soul, you see the feeling inside me  
your hand on my face, you whisper: is it love?

i can only breath in and breath out  
i look at you, shivering, exposed  
i can only nod and you smile, your eyes are not here.

i kiss you, hard.  
i hold you, easy.  
our lips part: i just want this.

no future is necessary  
i don't wanna think about tomorrow or right now.  
i want to feel. you and me.  
us.

this is the moment where i want to enjoy and gravitate in it.

your skin so soft  
i feel so warm, you touch my face again.  
my eyes on your eyes: _right now._  
and i smile.

 

**Author's Note:**

> idk


End file.
